3 Ways to Stay Positive in Our Crazy World

“I guess it comes down to a simple choice, really: Get busy living, or get busy dying.” 

This is my favorite quote from one of my favorite movies, The Shawshank Redemption.  Andy Dufresne (played by Tim Robbins) is an innocent man who is wrongly convicted and imprisoned for a horrific crime.  I’ll not spoil the story (although, I believe most have seen this movie) but will instead suggest that Andy finds ways to stay positive in his super crazy world.  His world was much worse than most of us will experience (thankfully) but he was still able to persevere and put his life plan into action, despite the absurd circumstances he faced.

I have always felt that part of the meaning Andy’s quote represents is the idea that we should get on with making the best of whatever life sends our way.  We either do that or capitulate and give up.  We all face adversity at different points in our lives.  Even daily challenges that present themselves during the “good times” can exhaust us and wear us down.  Work-related stress, family challenges, and health issues are all difficulties that seem to crop up when we least expect them.  Not to mention things like pandemics, droughts, wars, and celebrities slapping each other around at award ceremonies.  It’s enough to make one’s outlook on life be…well, not very positive.

I recently wrote about things I failed at during my career.  These failures certainly made work and life more challenging before I retired.  However, I wasn’t completely without tools to help me keep a positive mindset.  There isn’t anything magical about these ideas, but they’ve helped me along my journey.  Keeping a positive mindset in retirement seems every bit as important as when I was working fulltime, and I still routinely utilize these methods.  I hope you will find them helpful as well.

3 Ways to Stay Positive in a Crazy World

1. Laugh Every Day
2. Practice Voorpret
3. Grow Something Green

1.Laugh Every Day

My wife and I used to wonder why nobody mentioned that being a parent was so blasted funny.  Not always, of course, but raising children presented us with near daily amusement.  The video linked to this picture of our son Aidan provides just one example.  Nothing going on here except lunchtime in the ‘ole highchair.  I’m not sure if the mere fact that I pulled out my camera (yes, camera…no iPhones in 2002 😊) triggered him to act silly but silly he was on that day.

It’s easy to understand why laughter makes us feel good. Who hasn’t laughed uncontrollably with a friend or family member?  Intuitively, laughter just seems to make us feel good.  Well, there’s neuroscience that helps explain why.

Recent research suggests that laughter releases endorphins in the brain.  The receptors in our brain that produce endorphins are the same ones that narcotics bind to.  It’s then little wonder why laughing out loud can produce feelings of euphoria (without any of the nasty narcotic side effects).  Achieving a natural high is not the only benefit that comes from laughing.  Laughing also triggers the release of serotonin.  This is a brain chemical that is impacted by antidepressants.  There’s also some evidence that laughing together strengthens relationships and the bond between partners.  It seems that those who laugh together, stay together.

Actively looking for reasons to laugh every day has been one of the most important ways to stay positive for me.  Laughter may come from sharing a funny story at the dinner table or exchanging a back-and-forth text with friends, or watching something comedic on TV or YouTube.  Don’t get me wrong – some days I work hard to find something to laugh about.  On the other hand, those tend to be the days I need a good laugh most of all!

2.Practice Voorpret

Hopefully you’re wondering what the heck is voorpret?  It’s a Dutch word that means “the joy or pleasure ahead and in anticipation of an actual fun event”.  I’ve made a habit of printing off a year-at-a-glance calendar that I’m able to mark up with key dates and travel plans.  While I was working, this calendar became a clear way for me to show all the time I’d be on business travel, NOT at home (rats).  However, I was also able to mark down our family travel plans well in advance.  I, unknowingly, was practicing voorpret.

It might not be surprising to learn that a recent study suggests that we gain more positive feelings when looking forward to an event than we do remembering a past event.  I can recall the giddy anticipation for Christmas I felt as a kid.  All the preparation ahead of the holiday only served to strengthen my desire and impatience to experience Christmas day.  I also recall, less favorably mind you, the feelings of letdown afterwards.

Even though I’m an adult and our kids are teenagers now, the anticipation of Christmas and spending time together still brings us joy as we navigate our way toward the “big day”. 

Daily life can be a slog.  Looking forward to vacations and time away from work and school can be a superpower in the fight against the day-to-day doldrums we may experience for long periods.  When melancholy sets in, why not start planning some fun future event?  I’ve found that looking forward to even small trips or get-togethers can activate my voorpret to stay positive in our crazy world.  I think the secret is to always keep some good stuff out on the visible horizon – keep looking forward!

3.Grow Something Green

While there are many many hobbies out there to try, there’s something about growing plants that puts me in a positive mindset.  Whether it’s the satisfaction of working with a small slice of nature or the anticipation (“grow-pret” maybe?) of seeing flowers and vegetables blossom.  Gardening brings me calmness and focus.

I can recall telling a friend of mine that my morning, pre-work routine included going outside to water our flower garden.  The brief time I spent in the early morning light of the rising sun, just tending to the plants in our garden helped put me in happy frame of mind.

When I plan and plant a garden, I become a creator. I become an experimenter when I try new plants or methods of growing of them.  Gardening forces me to be patient (not a trait I always demonstrate).  I become an optimist watching the results reveal themselves as plants grow, and flowers blossom, and vegetables ripen.  Gardening is also a great reason to get outside and leave the phone neglected, even if only for small periods of time.

This year we have a bumper crop of cucumbers, which also means we’ll likely have a bumper crop of pickles.  We start seeds inside in March and we’ll continue to harvest cucumbers, tomatoes and chili peppers into October.  In this way, gardening shouldn’t be limited to being only a late spring/summer hobby.  Constrained by a lack of space or time?  Consider trying to start a small herb garden or some indoor succulents or cactus.  I don’t think you’ll regret the very real benefits to your outlook on daily life if you do!  (p.s. having garden to table fresh veggies is pretty awesome too!)

Ways to Stay Positive in Our Crazy World

Unfortunately, I don’t see too many signs that our world is going to get less crazy.  The best we can do is bring a little sanity into our own small corner of existence.  I’m convinced that before we can put positivity vibes out into the universe, we need to bring positivity into our own minds and hearts.  I’d love to hear about the ways you stay positive in our crazy world. Shoot me your top 3 list

Written by: A. Reed Reviewed by: B. Holman